Bullies and sports don’t mix…

As a parent with young kids I am always putting their feelings first, especially when it comes to their feelings.

Even things or comments that do not even relate to my kids I take notice to, such as at a Patriots game this winter a family was completely bad talking and being so very disrespectful and rude to our goalie… put into perspective the ages are 17-20. Completely uncalled for.

Two weeks ago a couple older soccer players (older than our sons teams age) were at our daughters game and were bullying our sons friend and then we found out one of them did tske our boys hat and wouldn’t give it back. Thankfully a parent intervened and those boys were not back last week. Our son described the boys and I am still temoted to say something but at this point am taking the higher road.

Tonight at our sons game one of his own team mates made a very rude bullied comment to him, we have heard this boy make remarks or push others around, however tonight when our son was in net we hear clear as day (across the field) “you stupid goalie” ….

Furious does not even begin to describe how I felt for many reasons. 1. For my son and his feelings – no he is not competitive and never has been, he’s not even 6 yet. 2. For the kid who said it – if that was my child he would have hear me from acroos the field telling him to smarten up and apologize – regardless of the gsme being in play. 3. For the kid’s parents… who said nothing. This kid who decided to call my son a “stupid goalie” is twice the size of my kid.

Yes I am still furious. I am writing to get it out, not to center anyone out or even make my kid look like he’s perfect, because he’s not, well behaviour wise lol, of course he does things wrong, he will test limits but he knows if he does something and we hear or see it there will be consequences that we, as his parents, will deal with, with him. He, no both our children also know that if they do something wrong and it has negatively affected someone, they will be apologizing for it regardless of where we are.

Sigh… clearly I cannot go up to an 8 year old and ask him where his manners are. And I am not going to make my son stop playing soccer when HE enjoys it. Just because my son is not competitive, should he be bullied? No! Should we push him to try or pkay harder? No, I refuse to. It was his choice to play, he wanted to and he enjoys it, I will not push him any harder just because other kids are more competitive. Should he be made to feel bad because he is not competitive and is just having fun? No!

I was never big on playing sports, perhaps this is why I stayed away, our son is very much like me, actually both me and my husband, I enjoyed watching sports, I played some basketball in high school but didn’t play organized sports in town.
I realize the sports in town are volunteer positions, much like the time and energy we put in for the town Jr C team… its a lot of time and effort, a lot that some people really do not see out on the outside. Its the Parents who need to be aware of what their children are not only doing during the sports but also think of how actions such as calling someone names will affect another child…

My heart sank and eyes welled with tears hearing my little boy say “I wasn’t watching when I was in net and they got a goal…” The rest of the game I wondered if he heard what that boy said. 😦 As a parent I know I need to remember that I cannot protect them from everything that could harm them, but if I continue to instill them with confidence and remind them that they do not need to give bullies any time at all!