Children and Marriage

Things out of the mouth’s of babes.

I love hearing the logic our kids come up with. Especially when they talk about marriage and family. One day the miss began talking through the family and about mommy’s mom and dad and how much SHE would miss her mommy and daddy if she didn’t live with us. What it came down to is how she lonely she thinks granpa and grama would be without all of us and that we should maybe live with them 😉

The other night the miss was dancing and did a curtsee, she then went on to tell me that when she gets married  she is going to do that. Of course I couldn’t let it go there, so I asked her if she is going to find her her hard working prince, she said yes, maybe Carson and I will get married when we get big. So I go on to explain to them (again) that brothers and sisters can’t get married to each other. Oh right she says, well when we get bigger both of us will meet someone and get married and then I will have a baby in my tummy.

Goodness shes not even 5 and talking of having a baby in her tummy.

The boy asks me how old they have to be to get married. I tell him 25. He then said something to me that warmed my heart, in more ways than one. I cannot remember his exact words but it was along the question of “how did you know”. I was so happy to tell him, when you meet someone who you love spending time with and you want to spend forever with, you’ll know that you have met the right person to marry.

Life isn’t perfect, marriage is not perfect. It certainly does make me feel like I am doing my “job” of being their mother right. There is no book of rules on parenting, there is no book of rules on marriage. Each is trial and error but both involve a lot of love.

With our 8 year wedding anniversary coming up next week hearing loving words come from our children’s mouths in relation to family, love and marriage. These two little people have truly made both of us the people we are today, they have truly shaped our family, our love, and rounded out our own personalities. Someday’s aren’t easy but we have each other and that is the absolute world of difference.

The past 8 years have almost been a slight blur… however the photographer part of me cherish’s all those moments and memories we have captured in photos and the best part – our kids LOVE looking at photos from all those years, watching not only themselves grow, but watching our family grow, watching us work hard to achieve dreams, comforting in times of sorrow, proud of all we’ve accomplished and all we’ve been through to be where we are today, together as a family.

Marriage, just like parenting, takes work. What makes me proud is how our children talk about when they grow up, how they want to work at the shop with mommy, daddy and granpa, how they talk of one day having their own kids just like mommy and daddy, making us a grama and granpa (can’t believe they talk like this actually haha I am no where near ready for that lol). What truly makes me proud though is how the kids talk about growing up and getting married to someone they love. Everyday may not be roses, but as a mom and wife I feel so very proud that we are setting a great example of being their parents and also husband and wife.

I am a very firm believer that kids should hold onto whatever innocence they can and just be kids. I am also a firm believer in living a real and simple life. They know about death – but not all details related, they have already asked about how some kids have different parents – which we’ve explained some have one mom or two moms or one dad or two dads or they ask questions, we give answers which satisfy their curiousity, they also see the real mommy and daddy, life isn’t perfect, mommy and daddy have had disagreements and we work through them, we also love & respect each other very much, but first of all we must love ourselves. As much as mommy and daddy love our kids, we also love our time too that we get to have alone. The see us tag team the other in, or each take a kid to get stuff done, or handle things together and even be honest about needing a break. Of course the chosen words are child safe for them to understand and if I have ever complained about my hubby dearest, I am more open in sharing why mommy does love daddy. Im not perfect, would never claim to be, but I am perfectly me! And everyday, we all learn something new 😉

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, 
always with the same person.
Mignon  McLaughlin

Don’t marry the person you think you can live with;
marry  only the individual you think you can’t live without.
James C. Dobson
(this is what I tell our kids… 🙂 )