2025 has been a journey, one where I can admit I self sabotaged on me many times. Blame it on overwhelm and exhaustion after years of caring for other family members, with on going worry and giving up on me, doing the bare minimum to get by.
Again, my gratitude for this challenge that is pushing me to my blog everyday – something I used to do! Its also pushing me to get a wee bit more raw into my healing, as a part of the human experience. I have a high respect for bloggers, I came into the blogging world around the time I became a mother, its been years and there is a beautiful feeling, from my experience, to reading someones story in blog posts, vs scrolling through social media – to read the same thing!
Last week, I finally opened that order, the box that came to replenish my vitamins, minerals, omega’s, digestive enzymes that had run out… last year. A few months ago, I did try something different, the drink version doesn’t align with my body, which is ok. I am back to my tried and true… that helped me balance my body 10 years ago when I began them – um also wow, 10 years!
Yet… in my own defence, no it would also probably actually be self sabotage, brain fog is very real. Very. I also had whiplash and a minor concussion at the beginning of the year, making notes is key for me. Notes, paper and electronically.
As a visual person, my solution. Something I will see everyday, multiple times.
If you look at the pink square on the fridge, you can click on the image and view it on my Flickr page, it reads Be Here Now. I did an 8 week course with a friend who is a mindset and emotional intelligence educator, and one of the weeks she had us put Be Here Now on multiple sticky notes and put them around our house. All of mine, except on the desk that was moved, are still there today.
Be. Here. Now.
To pull myself back to the here and now. To be present.
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“2025 has been a journey, one where I can admit I self sabotaged on me many times. Blame it on overwhelm and exhaustion after years of caring for other family members, with on going worry and giving up on me, doing the bare minimum to get by.“
Those could be my words Pam, I can relate to your thoughts about self sabotage with my full heart. Mom had a stroke and were paralyzed just when covid started. At the same time they found alzheimers starting to get her down. So, it’s been quite exhausting five years. I live three hour drive from her, but went there every other weekend to take care of shopping and cooking food to the freezer. And of course I spend all my holidays there. For the past year she was in a nursing home where she passed away in age 93 in June. So, I feel the same experience about neglecting myself and put my life in hold for that time. But it was worth it. Now the recovery is slow and have to give it time.
Ps. I have also quite a lot of vitamins I take every day 😉
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I am so sorry for your loss. I had a family member who experienced Alzheimers and its so sad, and as you say exhausting – for them and their caregiver!
I hope you have other family you will be able to be with these holidays with your mom gone, you will cherish those memories and time with her!
Thats one thing I think I need to accept deeper, it will take time and thats ok!!!
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Thank you so much Pam!
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Vitamins are important :-D. Most you get from your food. D vitamin is important in the winter due to lack of sunlight
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They truly are! Vitamin D is one that I need to get more of too!
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